Picture Credits : Oksana Taran
Wondering whether your are a perfectionist?
Answer the below questions genuinely and let us see if you are a perfectionist or not;
- You can submit your assignments or send in your work only when you are sure that it is perfect.
- You are happy with your work only when your work attracts praise.
- You believe that being perfect will keep your relationship with your significant other strong.
- You brood only on your failures.
- You prefer working alone rather than in a team.
If your answer is YES to majority of the questions above, chances are you are a true perfectionist.
We can choose to be perfect and admired or to be real and loved.
Glennon Doyle
No one could have summarized perfectionism better than the renowned clinical psychologist Anne Wilson Schaef when she said, “Perfectionism is self-abuse of the highest order.” Meaning to do things in time and perfect is definitely a good approach, But making ‘perfectionism’ the main goal is what you need to worry about.
Picture Credits : David Hofmann
What PERFECTIONISM looks like in day-to-day life
If you give it a serious thought, you will realise that infact there is no such thing called “perfectionism”. It is our fear of failure or the anxiety of outcome that pushes us towards procrastination in the name of perfectionism.
Just think about the thought process in our minds when we think about perfectionism; We don’t want to submit our project yet, because we want good grades and when that want of good grade suddenly gives us a pang of anxiety followed by the thought of “what if my project is not upto the mark, what if my fellow students or colleagues laugh at me when I present my project”, You will now decide that NO, Let me re-check and try to better my presentation.
Your mind will comuflage the anxiety and fear of failure nicely by packing it in a shining “false ego serving” wrap called Perfectionism.
Ways to overcome Perfectionism
Once you realise that you are trying to be a perfectionist, start internalising the fact that ‘Perfectionism’ isn’t a positive trait. To perform better in life in general you need to be adaptable to change. One of the main problems with perfectionism is being resistant to change. Once you get over being perfect you will be able to open up to new possibilities, learning different new things and all-in-all you will be able to work towards your growth.
Below are Five simple ways that you can implement in your everyday life to overcome perfectionism;
Scheduling
Perfectionists want to do everything by themselves . Schedule your activities based on your priorities. If not a perfectionist will get overwhelmed and procrastinate everything.
Procrastination
Perfectionists tend to procrastinate a lot as they fear failure. Remind yourself that no one can learn anything without making mistakes.
Positive Realistic Thinking
No one can always be in a pleasant mood or be calm or put together and be on time. Don’t think “I have to do this perfectly” But say “I will do this to the best of my abilities.”
Exposure
The best way to overcome any fear is to slowly expose yourself to it. As a perfectionist expose yourself to the possibilities of ‘Being late by 15 mins’ or ‘not cleaning that mess in the kitchen’. And do not get perturbed when someone comments on you not being on time or as polite or as well kempt .
The Big Picture
Perfectionists are particular about the minutest details. They need to ask themselves ‘if leaving this out will effect the project?’ or just ‘ Does it really matter?!’ Learn To Look at the Bigger Picture.